


A Moment of Reflection

by Alanna_Grey



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Angst, Blue Paladin Lance (Voltron), Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Gay Keith (Voltron), Hunk (Voltron) is a Good Friend, Insecure Lance (Voltron), Keith (Voltron) is Bad at Feelings, Keith (Voltron) is a Good Friend, Keith is a bit of a jerk, Keith opens up, Lance (Voltron) in Denial, Lance (Voltron) is a Good Friend, Lance opens up, Langst, Light Angst, M/M, POV Alternating, Pining Keith (Voltron), Red Paladin Keith (Voltron), but he didn't really mean it, tender moment, there's a lot of feelings
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-05
Updated: 2020-11-05
Packaged: 2021-03-08 23:14:05
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,399
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27404863
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Alanna_Grey/pseuds/Alanna_Grey
Summary: After training, Lance checks himself out in the mirror of the locker room. For a brief shining moment, he actually feels confident about himself. That is, until Keith comes in and destroys it with a joke. Realizing what he's done, Keith is determined to apologize and make things right.
Relationships: Keith & Lance (Voltron), Keith/Lance (Voltron)
Comments: 8
Kudos: 266





	A Moment of Reflection

Lance and Hunk made their way to the change room attached to the training room. Sure, they have their own bathrooms in their rooms but there’s nothing like a hot shower right after training. They keep their casual clothes there so they can get changed after too. It’s a bit quicker and easier so might as well take advantage of it. 

When they first came to space a few months ago, everyone went back to their rooms to shower and change. Everyone was still awkward and uncomfortable with each other. Well, except for Lance and Hunk; they had been roommates back at the garrison. Pidge had her own change room, so it was only Keith and Shiro that made things different. At first. Now though, things were starting to get better. 

Lance realized that Shiro wasn’t judging him for his slender frame or scrawny limbs. The man was a paragon of buff fitness but also super supportive and understanding. Lance was crazy jealous still, but no amount of training would get him those kinds of results. And Shiro was helping him to achieve what he could.

With Keith…. they had an understanding now. Lance didn’t find him to be quite so obnoxious anymore. He realized that his cold attitude was based more in awkwardness and trauma than superiority. 

Lance didn’t want to wipe that stupid quiznaking smirk off his face quite as much anymore. But there was also the new desire to smooth the wrinkles between his stupid quiznaking brows when the red paladin scrunched them together. Which happened far too often for his liking. 

Lance was maybe even beginning to start admitting that he may even like Keith. No, not like that. Not like, like-like, but you know, he likes spending time with him. He just wants him to be happy. Like all his friends. Wants to cheer him up when he's sad, listen when he’s troubled, comfort him when he's hurting, and hold him when he’s lonely. Juuuust like everyone else. There was noooothing extra special about Keith. Nope. Nuh-uh. Just friends. 

Hunk stretched and groaned beside him bringing him back to the present. 

“Man, that was tough today.” Hunk started to remove the armour plates from his suit. “I could shower for a thousand years and still be sore after that.” 

Lance laughed and started undressing too. “Yeah. I’m just glad it's over!”

They undressed the rest of the way in amicable silence, both drained after the particularly intense training session. 

Keith and Shiro had stayed to talk to Allura so, thankfully it was just the pair of them. 

Lance peeled off the black suit and wrapped a towel around his hips. Just because they were more comfortable didn’t mean they walked around naked, even in the change rooms. 

As he turned toward the showers, he caught his reflection in the full length mirror by the sinks. 

He paused to give himself a critical look over. 

His muscles were still tense and defined after the workout. He might even admit he looks good. His whole cocky, play-boy ego thing was a poor cover for his crippling self-doubt. Hunk keeps telling him it’s a lot more convincing than he thinks but Lance knows he’s only a hair away from slipping up and exposing his true self. Hunk also keeps telling him that he doesn’t need to try so hard to be something he’s not. That he’s good as he is. Lance doesn’t believe him, he’s pathetic, but he appreciates the sentiment. 

But right now. In this moment, he thinks he looks pretty good. 

The constant training and fighting and complete change of diet had slimmed his already slender frame, but made it more solid. His stomach is still flat but there’s some definition there now. Just a light shadow down to his belly button, a couple curves under his ribs and above his hips. It’s nice though; the start of a six-pack. His pecs actually have some muscle and are not just skin anymore. He flexed his arms and noticed that, while not much - nothing compared to Shiro - there’s an actual bicep muscle. It’s long and not beefy, but it’s defined and hard. And he has distinguished triceps as he shifts his arms around. He turns to check out his back. Were is shoulders always that broad? All the push-ups probably helped to fill out his shoulders to make them bigger. Which just accentuated his smaller waist. 

He turned back around and flexed his core again. Slightly obsessed with the way he looked. Not bulky, but not scrawny like he used to be. Strong and capable. And while it doesn’t seem like a lot, that’s okay. He’s happy with his progress. He can actually, genuinely, admit he looks pretty good. He smiled to himself in the mirror. It wasn’t often that he liked his appearance without picking it apart or finding something he hated, so he reveled in the moment. 

The moment was shattered with a short, unamused huff. 

“Don’t tell me you’re one of _those_ guys.” Keith’s voice drawled behind him. 

All the confidence he felt just a second ago shattered. He was pathetic, checking himself like a god damn dude bro. He was nothing to write home about. His increased muscle mass brought him up to an average level. And to be caught by Keith of all people. Too many emotions bubble up inside for him to identify any single one. It was too much at once. One extreme to the other too quickly. He couldn’t wipe the hurt expression off his face as he whipped around. 

Keith was standing there, arms crossed, hip cocked watching him with a bored expression. His eyes widened slightly with surprise at Lance’s face. 

Lance didn’t care if there were already tears pricking his eyes. 

“I’m already scraping the bottom of the barrel for self worth.” He spat trying to be angry but his voice was strained and raw. “Thanks for taking this from me too.”

He stomped to his clothes and armour, grabbed them quickly and stormed out of the change room. He shouldered past Keith when the man didn’t move. 

Lance didn’t care that he was still in just his towel, clothes clutched tightly to his chest. 

He didn’t stop at Keith’s spluttering or Hunk’s attempt to calm him down. Not even when Shiro called out his name in the training hall. He fled to his room and locked the door. 

God. He really was pathetic. One comment was all it took to completely expose him. One comment to make him fall apart. He should have just covered with a line but the comment caught him off guard and unprepared. It had really stung. 

He sat down on the edge of the bed and hid his face in his hands. Clothes and armour clanked to the ground. He let out a loud groan and fell back on the bed. Just another minute of self pity and then he would get up and try to resume his routine. 

—————

Keith entered the change rooms to shower after Shiro had asked him a few things about the training routine. 

The first thing he saw as he walked in was Lance, shirtless, towel slung low across his hips, flexing in the mirror. 

He was not prepared for that. Not at all. Sure, he knew, intellectually, that Lance was slender and fit. Their suits were skin tight after all. But seeing his flawless tan skin on full display and watching as his muscles rippled when he flexed was something different entirely. The few scars that marred his chest and back only added to the graceful but tough look. 

Keith swallowed. At first, Lance had pissed him off. But that had changed pretty quickly. He wouldn’t admit it to anyone, ever, but he liked Lance. As a friend and maybe more. He was gorgeous and kind and sweet and could keep up with Keith in terms of competition and didn’t get all awkward when Keith got defensive. Which was more often than he liked to admit. It was nice to have him around. 

But Lance was straight and would get awkward if he knew Keith liked him as more than friends. He had a hunch about it. Even if things sorted themselves out and they went back to being friends, they were in the middle of a war. It wasn’t something they had the time to work out. Plus things were good as they were right now and he didn’t want to ruin it. So Keith did what he does best. He shoved his feelings down and covered them with snarky indifference. 

He hoped the heat rising on his neck wouldn’t show as he crossed his arms and leaned into his hip. 

“Don’t tell me you’re one of _those_ guys.”

When Lance whipped around Keith was caught off guard by the look of absolute devastation on his face and the pain in his eyes. 

“I’m already scraping the bottom of the barrel for self worth.” His voice was raw. “Thanks for taking this from me too.”

Oh quiznak. He hadn’t meant to hurt him, just tease. Lance was usually so cocky about these things; always confident. He didn’t know. _He didn’t know._

He could only stare in shock as Lance grabbed his things and stormed out. It was only when Lance roughly bumped past him that he snapped out of it and tried to talk. He went to follow Lance out to apologize, but Hunk’s hand settled gently, but firmly, on his shoulder stopping him. 

“Keith, don’t…” His voice was also gentle but warning. 

Keith spun around to look at Hunk. He couldn't keep the confused, surprised look off his face. Hunk’s expression was one of understanding. 

“I didn’t think….” Keith trailed off not knowing how to finish his thought. _I didn’t think it would end like this._

“He just needs a bit of time right now. He’ll be back to normal tonight.” 

Hunk gave him a reassuring smile and turned to get dressed. 

“What was that?” Keith was still confused over what just happened. “He’s usually so confident.”

Hunk looked up after he slid his pants on. There was a sad smile on his lips.

“It’s not my secret to tell, so I can’t tell you much, but I can tell you a little.” Hunk continued dressing as he thought of the best way to explain. Keith waited patiently for him to continue. It took a lot not to demand answers or run after Lance but he tried his best to be patient. 

“Lance… has a lot of walls. He’s not, necessarily, always… I dunno dude.” Hunk sighed. “Did you know he’s the youngest of five kids? That’s a lot of shadows to be in. And when he was accepted into the garrison program, which is an amazing feat in and of itself, he was assigned to be a cargo pilot. He was only one place from fighter class. It was pretty tough on him.”

Keith just stared at him. “Oh.”

“Look,” Hunk rubbed the back of his neck. “It’s not a secret but he doesn’t like to talk about it. So, maybe, don’t mention that I said so much?”

Hunk really was a good friend. Keith wished he had had someone to look out for him in the same way when he was younger. He supposed that was what Shiro had been. But with more discipline, which was what he needed. 

Hunk, fully dressed, rest his hand on Keith’s shoulder again. 

“Just, let him calm down and apologize later. It’ll be okay.” 

Keith just nodded and watched as Hunk left. 

Lance avoided him for the rest of the day. Keith didn’t know what to do. He just wanted to apologize, but every time he got close Lance would excuse himself or straight up disappear. 

By dinner time, Keith was frustrated. He arrived late to dinner to make sure he sat next to Lance. Lance refused to look at him and hardly acknowledged his existence. It was a tense dinner and everyone ate in silence. 

Lance hurriedly stuffed the last scoop of green goo into his mouth and stood immediately. 

“Welp. Thanks for dinner. Gotta go.”

Keith grabbed Lance’s wrist, preventing him from walking away. 

Lance looked down at his wrist then to Keith. He was scowling, expression wary and guarded. 

Before either of them could say anything Pidge shot out of her chair. 

“Well! Look at the time. Gotta science now!” She practically fled the room barely managing to dump her half full bowl in the sink before disappearing. 

Hunk got up and put his hand on Lance’s shoulder, slowly pushing him back into his seat. 

“Space goo was palatable tonight. Gonna go help Pidge.” He shot a look at Allura who also stood. 

“Come on, Coran. I just remembered that thing we need to take care of, on the bridge.”

“Ahh yes. That thing.” Coran stood and the pair left. 

Shiro shot Keith a look that said ‘this is your fault and you’re supposed to apologize and not blow up at him for avoiding you’. Keith glanced away as Shiro stood and walked away with Hunk. Apparently he didn’t feel the need to give a lame excuse. 

Then it was just the two of them in the large dining hall. Keith wanted to apologize but he hadn’t actually thought about what he was going to say. He was never very good at expressing himself and the tension in the room made it harder. 

“You can let go of my wrist now.” Lance said, breaking the long moment. “I’m not going to bolt.”

“Oh.” Keith blinked down at his hand still wrapped around Lance’s wrist. He had forgotten. “Right. Sorry.” 

Lance was tense beside him. Keith recognized the stubborn set his mouth got when he argued.

“Look, if it’s about earlier…”

“It is.” Keith looked at Lance, willing himself to maintain eye contact. “I’m sorry. I took things too far and I hurt your feelings. So I’m sorry.” His words were blunt and to the point. He tried to make his voice sound genuine in his apology. He hoped Lance would understand. 

Lance visibly deflated. His posture sagged and his face softened and he studied Keith’s face. The stubbornness and the fight left him. Lance turned away from Keith and toward the table. He scrubbed his face with a hand and sighed. 

“It’s okay.” He glanced at Keith sidelong and offered a small smile. 

Keith bristled. He should leave well enough alone but seeing a small defeated smile where a cocky grin belonged did not sit well with him. 

“No, it’s not okay. I was an ass.” He was frustrated with himself on Lance's behalf. 

Lance turned to him again and studied him for a moment. 

“Okay. I forgive you.”

Keith didn’t realize how powerful those words were or how much he wanted to hear them until they were said. He felt himself relax. 

“And I’m sorry too.” Lance continued. “It _may_ have been childish to avoid you all day. I was just…. embarrassed.” He looked down, his cheeks tinged pink. 

“You don’t have to apologize to me.”

“Maybe,” Lance shrugged. “But I want to. I want us to be cool.”

“Yeah. Me too.” Keith’s voice was softer and far more fond than he expected. 

“So,” Lance still couldn’t look at him, “how much did Hunk tell you?”

“Uh, not much?” Keith shifted in his chair. 

Lance snorted. 

“So you, uh, wanna talk about it?”

Lance lifted his gaze to meet Keith’s, head still hung but peered up through his lashes. His brow was cocked, face unimpressed. 

“Not much to talk about.”

Keith wasn’t convinced, but could tell he wasn’t going to get anywhere like this. He changed tracks, remembering how Shiro had once gotten him to open up by revealing something about himself. 

“I’ve never lived in anyone’s shadow. But when I got to the garrison, Shiro vouched for me. So every time I screwed up, it reflected on him. That felt pretty bad.”

Lance’s expression softened and he sat up a bit, like he was really listening. He probably was. Lance was a good listener. He was a good friend. 

“And when Shiro went missing… I… I lost myself. In the grief and the anger. He still doesn’t actually know that I was expelled. I don’t want to face that kind of disappointment.” Keith crossed his arms. He really didn’t want to imagine Shiro’s disappointed face or how hurt his brother would be when he found out. 

Lance put a reassuring hand on Keith's shoulder. 

“Hey. He might be disappointed but you know he’s so proud of you, right?”

Keith smiled sadly. “I dunno…”

“Seriously dude. You should see how he beams in training when you’re not looking. I know he’s trying to do the impartial space dad thing, but he shows it in so many ways.”

“Thanks, Lance.” 

There was a small, soft moment growing between them as they gazed at each other. By all rights it should have been romantic, but it wasn’t. It was just two good friends opening up about their insecurities and trusting the other to be there. Keith would cherish this moment. Even if they couldn’t be more, Lance was a good friend. 

“I was the youngest of five.” Lance started off softly. He shifted his gaze but kept his hand on Keith’s shoulder. “I was never the first to do anything and I was never the best at anything. My siblings were all adults or moved out but the time I was a teen, so to mama, raising me was nothing special. Not that she didn’t love me!” He added hurriedly. “Cause I know she really did… but... And then at the garrison, I wasn’t good enough to be a fighter pilot. It was only ‘cause some hot-headed, impulsive mullet got expelled that I managed to move up.” Lance sighed, his attempt at humour falling flat. He slowly took his hand back from Keith's shoulder, like he was drawing in on himself. “I try my absolute hardest and I’ll only ever be second best.” His voice was so soft and quiet at his somber admission. 

Keith felt his heart rip itself in half. Lance was their sharpshooter. Their goofball with a heart of gold. He kept their spirits up when things got tough. It was heart wrenching to hear that he didn’t see himself as good enough. 

He got the overwhelming urge to reach out and touch. To comfort. Like Lance did so casually with all of them. Keith reached out hesitantly and finally placed his hand gently on Lance’s shoulder. 

“No. That’s not true. Lance, you are so good at what you do. You may not be the best at everything, but you are the best at your things.”

“Like screwing up.” Lance let out a huff of a laugh. 

“Lance. I’m being serious.”

“Thanks Keith. You’re a good friend.”

Keith really wanted Lance to understand, to believe Keith and believe in himself. But this was a deep wound that would take more than a minute with Keith to undo. 

After a moment Lance took a deep breath and released it with a sigh as he patted his thighs. 

“Okay. I think that’s enough emotions for one evening. We good?”

“Yeah. We’re good.” Keith nodded and they both got up to put their bowls in the sink. 

“What are you going to do now?” Lance asked. 

Keith hadn’t really thought about it but he would mostly likely end up in the training room again. 

“I dunno. Probably train?”

“Ah maannn.” Lance whined. “You train wayyyy too much. Come bug Pidge and Hunk with me.”

Keith gave him a skeptical look. He wasn’t sure if bugging them while they were ‘sciencing’ was a good idea. 

“It’ll be fun! Plus, if you’re worried they’re actually working on something important, they probably aren’t. After dinner is usually side projects.” Lance bumped shoulders with him. “Whaddaya say?” 

One of the skills Lance was best at was making people feel included and welcome. Keith didn’t know how he managed it or how the boy didn’t notice it, but he appreciated it so much. Lance was one of the main reasons their little group was able to function as well as it did. Well, after the whole, rivalry thing. Keith smiled to himself. 

“Yeah. I’d like that.”

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading! I hope you enjoyed it.  
> It may have been a bit melodramatic, but that's the mood I was feeling while writing :P  
> (Also, in my head canon they end up together after the war, when they are a bit older and wiser.)


End file.
